Morning Thoughts with Alice, #22

I kind of lied. A little. I haven’t fully conquered my fear of driving over bridges, and I don’t have a secret cure for scary roads.

I do, however, have a method that I’m finding does help. But it only works for bridges and roads I’ve never been on before.

And that method? Denial and ignorance.

I no longer look ahead on a map to see if we will be crossing water or mountains.

So here’s what happens. We’re driving along, singing the Laverne and Shirley theme song or some other great piece of music when all of the sudden *boom* there’s a bridge in front of us. My husband and I (he is usually driving) slowly stop singing and begin talking softly. Well, he stops saying anything and is intensely focused on the road, while I casually mention how so many of the towns look alike, oh but this one has a beautiful skyline.. I wonder when it was settled.. blah blah blah…. Only it’s a pleasant occasional blah blah blah and not a panicked or rushed BLAH BLAH BLAH!! And before you know it, we’re over the bridge, or past the mountain, or merged onto some six+ lane high-speed death-trap of a highway through some town much too populated for it’s roads.

And then we breathe a mighty exhale and one of us says our favorite traveling quote, “It wouldn’t be an adventure if it didn’t make us want to cry at least once.” And this is very true. For car trips and corn mazes.

I have found that we have faced 100% of the bridges and highways we’ve had to face. And by not knowing what’s up ahead, we considerably reduce the amount of time we spend fretting. There it is, my trick – denial and ignorance.

Concerning all those scary roads and bridges I already know about, I’ve got nothing except that they do get easier every time we go over them. And if I’m driving it helps me to chant, “It’s only a road, it’s only a road, no matter how high, it’s only a road.”

So good luck on your driving adventures! Don’t be afraid to be afraid! And remember, “Schlemiel! Schlimazel! Hasenpfeffer Incorporated! We’re gonna do it…”

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