Two things I’ve noticed

First thing. Tickticktickticktick. That’s the speed my body moves – my thoughts, my hands (often trembling to keep up), my heart, my digestion.

Tick…tick…tick…tick…. That’s the speed some other people’s bodies move. They… move… from… one… thing… to… the… next.

There is something else I’ve noticed. We all have a finite amount of stamina. Some people give-out halfway through the day, some right after dinner (me), some not until after they’ve forced themselves to go to bed, even though they aren’t sleepy.

So now, mix your ticking pace with your stamina level and this is your typical day. This is how you do that voodoo that you do. Your groove. (Note: Depression slows even the fastest tickers down. Ask me how I know.)

Sometimes I look at women who have a slower drumbeat than mine as the holiest of the holy women. “Those are the wise gentle women the Bible speaks about that I should try to be more like because I am just way to jittery.”

And sometimes I look at women who accomplish great things after dinner. “Those are the godly women the Bible speaks about who aren’t afraid to work hard and who always know what is important and will get it done. I should try to be more like that.”

Who’s a silly girl? Who’s a silly girl!!

Me. I am.

Energy levels are not a basis or guideline for godliness. It’s not a choice. It’s how you were made. Some people are fast tickers, some people are slow tickers. Some of us have a small amount of stamina, some can run marathons. All of us are somewhere on “the spectrum,” or rather, the drum line.

Yes, there are always ways to help tweak your energy for the day… grab a nap if you can, swig some coffee, get a good night’s sleep… but often, in my case anyway, it is beyond my control. These – the trembling hands, racing heart, breakneck digestion (I’m always hungry), sprint to the finish line thoughts, crash after dinner – these are the things I have to work with. Today.

So be it.

And….. I’m off!


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