I have been avoiding my favorite online journaling site 750words.com. I have been avoiding my spiral notebooks and scrap paper. I have even been avoiding my blog. Why? Because they scare me.
What will happen (as is happening right now) is I will sit down to write. I may not have anything in particular in mind, I may just be brain dumping. But I will write. And if I do it often enough eventually something will come to me that excites me. And when I am excited, I have to share it.
No, you don’t understand, I have to share it.
It’s no good saying “write it and keep it to yourself.” I’m not built that way. Yes, I can keep highly personal things to myself. And the things I write that may hurt somebody usually don’t get aired. (Usually). But the rest of the stuff, oh, it’s going out there.
So why is this a bad thing?
I am wired for deep communion and privacy, approval and full-disclosure expression. Contradictory things that when brought together can create an interesting salad of emotions.
The recipe goes like this: Write, get excited, share, walk away, do something else, feel exposed, feel regret, add oil and vinegar, gently stir and serve.
I’m a little weary from the whole thing. Does this process confirm that I should not be writing and sharing? Or does it only mean that I will have to pay a little emotionally when I do? I would like an answer please.
I’m serious. I would.
Post, Alice 
Alas, I have no perfect answer. All I can say is, if you are not being taxed emotionally when you write, you may be holding back your best work. So yes, you may have to pay more emotionally. I think all writers do. We create very personal poetry, stories, etc…and in doing so it is only natural that we feel exposed. But it’s also the only way we write authentically. So just keep writing. 🙂
Thank you! Yep, I’m going to keep writing anyway and just see where it takes me. So far it hasn’t been fatal! 😉 Thanks again for the encouragement.
You’re always welcome. 😀