#3 in my list of Alice’s Personal Rules and Mantras (to happiness) is, “If I don’t do it, who will?” This does NOT mean, “I guess I have to do everything around here, because I’m the only one who ever does anything grumble grumble sigh sigh.”
I clean every week for an elderly couple. Back in their closet, out of range of the vacuum cleaner, I saw a paper clip on the ground. For a moment I thought, “They can get that later.” Then it dawned on me, “No, they can’t.” They honestly can not bend over, crawl under their hanging clothes, and pick up that paper clip. If I don’t do it, who will? What a small incident! But it really got me thinking.
“If I don’t do it, who will?” is the question I ask when I find myself hesitating to act. For example, let’s say the doctor tells me I have acute psuejofhakhf sdjoj. There will be a moment, sitting in that doctor’s office, when I’ll feel like I should know what that means. But if I don’t ask the doctor, who will? My health is my responsibility. If I don’t do it, who will?
Another example. What if an email goes out asking for help with some such thing. I ask myself, “If I don’t do it, who will?” and if the answer is, “Someone else,” I can move on. If the answer is, “No one,” I ask myself if I care. Maybe I really don’t care if the 8th grade has cupcakes for Super Booster Spanish Club Monday. If I don’t care, I’m moving on. BUT, if the answer is “No one” or “Someone else” and I do care, and I do want to be involved, well then, I will. AND I probably didn’t have to ask myself the question in the first place, because we usually do what we want to do. Admit it.
It also keeps me from being too lazy. If I don’t cook a healthy meal for my family, who will? If I don’t buy ink for the printer, who will? If I don’t do the dishes… someone else can. I don’t have to do everything around here…